justjim's posterous http://justjim.posterous.com Most recent posts at justjim's posterous posterous.com Thu, 06 May 2010 23:57:05 -0700 Turtle eggs http://justjim.posterous.com/turtle-eggs http://justjim.posterous.com/turtle-eggs

World Wide shame  in COSTA RICA 


Please distribute widely 

The Turtle eggs  are stolen to be sold

                                                                                          The PLANET IS THANKFUL


 

 

 

 

 


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http://files.posterous.com/user_profile_pics/183905/Dawn___Jim__2__cropped.jpg http://posterous.com/users/4aqp6EZoBWHn Jim Johnston justjim Jim Johnston
Thu, 24 Sep 2009 19:15:40 -0700 My Neighbors http://justjim.posterous.com/my-neighbors-5 http://justjim.posterous.com/my-neighbors-5

The lesbians next door asked me what I would like for my birthday.

I was quite surprised when they gave me a Rolex. 

 It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, “I wanna watch.”

 

 

 



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Wed, 23 Sep 2009 02:07:07 -0700 PLEASE DONATE http://justjim.posterous.com/please-donate http://justjim.posterous.com/please-donate
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I have just had a call from a Charity, asking me to donate some of my clothes to starving Africans.

I told them to Fuck off!!

Anybody who fits into my clothes is not starving!!

 


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Wed, 23 Sep 2009 01:55:30 -0700 92nd birthday http://justjim.posterous.com/92nd-birthday http://justjim.posterous.com/92nd-birthday

An old fellow was celebrating 92 years on this Earth.
He spoke to his toes.

 "Hello, toes!" he said. "How are you, toes? You know, you are 92 today.
Oh, the times we've had! Remember we walked in the park in summer every Sunday afternoon. The times we waltzed on the dance floor? Happy Birthday, toes!"

 "Hello, knees," he continued. "How are you, knees? You know you're 92 years old
today. Oh, the times we've had! Remember when we marched in the big
parades? Oh, the hurdles we've jumped together. Happy Birthday, knees!"

 Then, he looked down at his crotch. "Hello Willie! You little bugger, if
you were alive today, you'd be 92."

 

 

 


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Sat, 19 Sep 2009 04:01:57 -0700 The Fairy & The Immigrant http://justjim.posterous.com/the-fairy-and-the-immigrant http://justjim.posterous.com/the-fairy-and-the-immigrant

    The Fairy & The Immigrant

Image001


   A  beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute  refugee claimant outside the Ottawa  Immigration Offices. 

Image002

'My good  man,' the fairy said,

'I've been told to grant  you three wishes, since you’ve just arrived in Canada with your wife and seven  children.'
The man  told the fairy:

'Well, in Pakistani where I come  from we don't have good teeth, so I want new  teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them.'
The fairy  looked at the man's almost toothless grin and  --PING!!! He had a brand new shining set of gold  teeth in his mouth!
'What  else?' asked the fairy, 'two, more wishes,  to go'.
The  refugee claimant now got bolder.
'I need a  big house with a three car garage in Toronto  with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest  of my refugee relatives who still live in my  country. I want to bring them all over  here.

PING! - In  the distance there could be seen a beautiful  mansion with a three car garage, a long  driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ, and a  sparkling inground pool and a Hummer, full of  his nephews playing their music.
'One,  more wish, left for you', said the fairy, waving  her wand. 

   I want to  be Canadian with Canadian clothes instead of  rags, and a baseball cap instead of this shawl  and I want to have white skin like the  Canadians.'
PING! -  The man was transformed, wearing worn out jeans  from Best for Less, a dirty Wall-Mart T-shirt and a  greasy baseball cap.  He had his  bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared  from the horizon.
'What  happened to my new teeth?' he wailed.   'Where is my new house? Where’s my Visa  Gold Card?'

 The fairy  said 

 'Tough luck. Now that you are Canadian, 

 you're entitled  to 

 sweet fuck all like the  rest of  us”.
 And she  disappeared

 

 
 

 

 

 

 



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Sat, 19 Sep 2009 03:57:49 -0700 what a way to make a buck http://justjim.posterous.com/what-a-way-to-make-a-buck http://justjim.posterous.com/what-a-way-to-make-a-buck

Posted: Monday, September 14 2009 at 06:00 am CT by Bob Sullivan

It’s the very definition of a bad day. No quarters in your pocket, the line at the post office is longer than expected or you need to grab lunch and don’t have time to circle the block and find parking. You run back out and get to your car just in time to see a parking officer pulling away after leaving a ticket on your windshield.

For want of a quarter, you now owe $50 to some government agency.

There was a time that such calculated risk-taking might have paid off. Odds were against a meter maid spotting your car at just the wrong time. Or perhaps you were good at talking your way out of tickets.  No more. 

Parking meters and meter maids have become less forgiving. Around the country, cash-strapped municipalities are turning to what's sometimes called a "curb tax" to shore up weak balance sheets. Cities are raising ticket prices, hiring more citation officers, turning to gimmicky technologies, even selling their parking systems and enforcement to the highest bidder, all in a desperate effort to shrink budget gaps.

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Fri, 18 Sep 2009 06:58:33 -0700 it's Friday! http://justjim.posterous.com/its-friday-27 http://justjim.posterous.com/its-friday-27
Fridays were at one time my favorite day... it was the end of the work week but now my work week seems to never end... So let's just celebrate it as a damned fine day to do not very much!

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Fri, 18 Sep 2009 05:13:06 -0700 My First Blog Post http://justjim.posterous.com/my-first-blog-post-13801 http://justjim.posterous.com/my-first-blog-post-13801
This really is my first blog post ...  I wonder what I'll send?

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Beatnick_bandit

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